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To self discovery.

Your benevolent Chief in all her glory. 📸: @hafsi_hafeedoh on IG. "Choose  yourself, twice". This journey to self discovery is a tough one. In life, people speak of how to treat others, how to be a kind person to them but rarely ever remind you to extend the same grace to yourself.  For example, look at me. I recently evaluated and realized that how a lot of people treated me was only an extension of how I treated myself. I almost never cut myself any slack, at the slightest mistake I'm quick to call myself names, never extending any iota of grace as I would to any other person.  This behavior is toxic, and coming to terms with it was hard.  I found out that I disrespected myself in many ways.  From watering down my skills and achievements just to make others comfortable, To calling myself names, To blaming myself for little mistakes and even situations I had no control over.  By doing these things I indirectly sent signals to people that it is okay to water down my abil
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The "thing" that kills.

  Those who know death know it doesn't kill. The thing that kills is greater than us all, This thing's power flows from  within our minds, Just like bile and spreads until it envelopes us, It's essence is to somehow find its way into our existence.  Nobody speaks of how it kills, Or how destructive it is because we are always blindsided by it's beauty, As though beauty ever overshadows  darkness. The thing that kills is in you, In us all, And we live everyday,  Fighting to kill it first. I'm trying my hands on short poetry 🙈. I have decided to take risks here.  Till next time, Your Chief.

This is XIX

  "This year, I'm stepping into enjoyment. The very core of my existence". -Chief.  Welcome back to the dom my people.  Let me start by apologizing for leaving you for too long, it will (not) happen again 🙂.  Today's blog post is a life update . A lot has changed since the last time I wrote to you. So, I'm basically going to fill you in.  First things first, I'm aging. Nineteen whole years around the sun and it's been one hell of a ride. I truly believe this year is the one I'll thoroughly enjoy myself. I can't wait to key into that.  Second things second, (Ha) I'm learning a lot of new things about friendship. I've had to hold back and withdraw from a couple of situations and it is by far one of the most difficult things I have had to do. However, sometimes we get so comfortable with the idea of being someone's friend that we absolutely ignore when it's not working. That is  unhealthy and extremely toxic. There's more to life

Speaking of Money

"When it comes to Money I dey concentrate" - Burna boy (Yè). The whole idea of money is weird.  I know all there is to know about how it works and all of the "lessons" attached but I still don't get it. I don’t understand how something so valuable can be contained in the most inconsequential form and not lose its value. It doesn't even need a physical currency anymore and it is the singular most important thing in the world. Money doesn't make sense to me but I love it anyway. The fact that I woke up one day in this world (Nobody asked for my permission by the way) and I'm supposed to do whatever to make this money just to get by and live a soft life until the day I drop dead? This is the concept I don't agree to but today is not the day for arguing economical constructs.  Now, the major issue I have with money is how we address it. Nobody ever tells you what you need to know about money, at least, not the important things. For something so vital

Don’t disgrace me .

"Disgrace na the national cake, everyone must chop him own". I read somewhere that the universal language that every person in the world understands is a smile. I agree. However, I think the one thing that we share in common is our ‘fear’ for disgrace. Collectively, everyone detests disgrace . We all have this resentment for anything that might "stain your white" . This is what motivates us to be the very best at whatever we do. Maybe it’s not exactly the dominant reason, but you’ll agree with me that a lot of decisions we make are fueled by the necessity to have an edge over everything and everyone else including disgrace. You don’t have to agree, but pretend you do.  The very first time I heard the phrase “Don’t disgrace me” was from my mother. It was my birthday and we had gone out as a family. My mum, my brother, my sister and I went to eat at Mr Biggs. I was about 6 years old and I was about to dig both my hands into my food when my mother screamed “Stop that,

Everything good will come.

 Rest, The best is yet to come (and so is the worst). -J. As you must know, In a few days 2020 will be over and I thought to myself, what better way to wrap up such a wild year than to exude good vibes and positive energy. So here we are guys, this is my  attempt to give your 2020 a          “See ya never party”. Truth is, when the clock strikes twelve on the 31st and we march into a new year nothing actually changes. What we actually get is a chance to be better, do better, reflect and actually work on ourselves.  So I curated a "good vibes" album for you to lift your spirits before we go into the new year. There are a lot of lessons to be learnt from this year, some wins and some losses.  Credit: Pinterest. Learn, unlearn, relearn and come back better. Happy holidays, Chief.

Re: Call me chief.

 “It is a lot better the second time around”. -Vini Dawson. It has been too long my dears. So long that it feels like the first time we met. I must admit, I’ve forgotten what this space felt like, how nice it felt to engage you but like home, I’m fitting right in regardless of how long I’ve been gone. Right? I miss this. I miss having a community to report to. So if I’m not too late shall we do this again? For real this time . I promise I won’t run off (for this long at least) okay? A lot has changed in my life, but definitely not my plan to elope. That grand plan is now a drive. I wake up each day reminding myself that all of my sufferings in Nigeria are closer to the end . I’m tired of the nonsense that is this entire country put together.  A lot has happened so I’m trying to pick out noteworthy events  so you’re up to date . One of them is that I have picked up a poverty habit . If your chief is in traffic, chances are very high that she’ll rather walk the distance than wait. I’ve f